


I was going to tell a joke about time travel but nobody laughed

by drownoutlove (Sept_Meules)



Category: EOS 10 (Podcast), Wolf 359 (Radio)
Genre: Attempt at Humor, M/M, Panic Attacks, Post The Watchtower (Wolf 359), Pre I've Got a Feeling (Eos 10), Space Stations, Time Travel, akmazian knows stuff, lol wtf doug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-28
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2019-03-10 19:50:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,920
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13508586
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sept_Meules/pseuds/drownoutlove
Summary: Somehow, getting suck into Wolf 359, Bob took him to another part of space. Another spaceship. An Eos 10.---He handed Jane her coffee. “Hey, Doc. You want one too?”“How did you,” Dr Urvidian started, “in less than 48 hours in this ship, got what Nurse Johns couldn’t do?”





	I was going to tell a joke about time travel but nobody laughed

**Author's Note:**

> So how does one write four thousand words in 28 pages? Double spacing and hitting the space bar twice every paragraph. Yes.
> 
> So, this is a sort of fix-it coz I wanted to see an Eos 10 x Wolf 359 crossover. And if you can't find it, make it, right?
> 
> shout out to Gabe at FFN who beta'd for me, she's writing Pokemon and a MeridaxArthur Disney big bang crossover which turned into an angst fic and she asked me to put emotions in that one chapter, so check her out at ineedathesaurus.

.

 

 

Doug Eiffel, Commander-in-Chief of everything going chicken shit, knew something was up when he opened his eyes.

Of course, he was in space, there'll always be something up. But there was something else about the place he's in.

There was the steady beat of a heart monitor nearby, his own heartbeats probably. The bed's cushion wasn’t as flat from the two years of lying down on it.

And the room wasn’t as sterile white mental asylum as he's so accustomed to. No, it was more… welcoming? If one could call a hospital room that. 

“Oh good, you're awake.” Came a low voice, almost drawling. But not quite, er… Russian.

Eiffel finally moved his head to look at the person who was talking.

The man was reading something off of a tablet.

“Doctor Hilbert?” He managed to utter. Maybe he shouldn’t have said the name of the man who had died from an explosion. But that was the one name he could think of right now.

This seem to have snapped the man from his tablet. He looked up and narrowed his eyes at him, “Excuse me?”

“You're…” He cleared his throat, raw from disuse. He offered a smile, but looked and felt more like a grimace. “Y’ain’t Hilbert, are ya?” Eiffel thought. More to himself, rather than to the man. “Cause you got a full mop of hair, and you're not really aligned to Mother Russia, are you?”

The man blinked in surprise, brows going up, “What.”

Then out of the blue, a woman burst into the room, “Dr Urvidian, the new nurse is an insufferable dolt! He just called me out on Dr Osolong!”

Dr Urvidian, Eiffel guessed is the doctor attending to him, opened his mouth to reply, but the nurse paused when she finally noticed Eiffel. “Oh. Oh! Hello there, how you doin?” She asked jutting her hip to the side and smiling quite suggestively. “You're hot.”

Eiffel smiled again, this time looking more like a smile, “Doug Eiffel, nice to meet you.”

Dr Urvidian rolled his eyes and glared at the nurse, “Nurse Johns, if you would please--"

She smiled sweetly at the doctor, the reason for her storming in the room had been thrown away. “What can I help with, Doc?” She asked giddily.

The man heaved a long suffering sigh, “If you would kindly extract blood from Mr Eiffel's arm.”

Nurse Johns left Eiffel's line of sight, walking to the left, then coming back again with a small syringe. She stood just to his left arm. Having a good feel of the meat on his bicep, she grinned down at him, “Go to the gym often?”

He shifted in the bed, only to finally be aware that he was strapped rather tightly in it. “Uhm,” he chuckled nervously, “am I scheduled for a lobotomy, doc?” Maybe Goddard had a stealth space ship following the Hephaestus, far enough from being alarmingly close, but close enough to take Eiffel in. Maybe they were another batch of SI5 operatives, maybe they were SI6?

Dr Urvidian gestured vaguely to Nurse Johns, only for her to plunge the needle into his skin and extracted blood. It was so fast, Eiffel barely felt it. Maybe due to routine. Maybe it was the Decima virus.

“Here's the thing, Mr. Eiffel.” Dr Urvidian started. He swiped his tablet to the right so much Eiffel would’ve vouched the doctor was on Tinder. “Alliance guards found you floating towards Eos 10 in just a space suit. I’ve seen a lot of things, but the guards were betting a lot of credits to see if you were the Empty Man.”

Nurse Johns took the syringe of Eiffel's blood and put it in one of those machines that Eiffel knew would tell him what blood type he was.

“I’m an O negative.” He muttered.

“Indeed you are.” Dr Urvidian commented, staring back at his tablet. “There's considerable trace amounts of alien genes in your system, Mr Eiffel. Usually, human biology would reject such, even to the point of death.” He typed in his tablet, “The non-human genes coursing through your veins is of a very endangered alien race, the last of which live in the Leo constellation, star Wolf—”

“Wolf 359.” Eiffel continued, breathless.

It doesn’t add up. The doc just said that Bob is of endangered alien race? That can’t be. The knowledge in his head input by Bob (him)self was screaming in disagreement. Their race was alive, striving. They were pioneers, only starting trade with other species.

If that was the case, Eiffel had an inkling feeling he’s not where he's supposed to be. If anything, these guys couldn’t be even SI6, but SI221 or something.

He heaved, “What is the date today?”

The nurse looks at her watch, “It's January—”

Dr Urvidian cut in, he had been observing Eiffel. He seem to understand what Eiffel was getting on. “It’s the year 21XX.”

Eiffel groaned, “Bob took me to the wrong time.”

“From _when_ are you?” Baffled, Nurse Johns asked.

He smiled drily at her, then replied, “The twenty-first century.”

 

 

 

 

 

Eos 10 was _enormous_.

It was larger than the Urania, or the Hephaesthus. Or both combined. Or both combined twice.

It wasn’t just a space shuttle of 20 or so scientists, it was where thousands of different life forms pass by, live in, visit.

Plus, this place had artificial gravity! 

It was taking Eiffel a lot of mental willpower not to scream and point at every non-human being he and Jane passed by.

Right now, she was taking Doug to the Quartermaster who she had warned him as being a double headed killjoy.

It turned out it looked exactly as what Jane had told him as. 

“This is…” “Who?”

Jane smiled up at the Quartermaster; while Eiffel stood quietly beside her, his hands in not-his pockets. They got him in what seems to be fancy space scrubs, there was even the embroidered name on the chest. ( _Dr Urvidian was staring at Jane grimly as she picked the lock on the locker in the Chief Surgeon’s office._ ) These clothes must be the Surgeon guy's. A medium sized guy. A Dr Dalias.

They were at the Quartermaster's office to notify it and the Alliance about Eiffel's status.

“The space suit your guys found floating around.” So they weren’t lying about that. “He's originally part of the earlier deep space missions of Earth.”

“And how is this significant?” One of the heads questioned.

“He was sent to the wrong time! And the wrong place.” 

“So how do you propose…” “We help in his predicament?”

Jane folded her arms over her chest, “Dr Urvidian asked that we get him settled in in the meanwhile. And when the people from the Alliance find him as a guy from the 21st century—”

“Wait. This man…” “Is from the 21st century?”

Eiffel grinned and did finger guns.

The Quartermaster narrowed its eyes at him, then turned to Jane, “There's no vacancy—”

“Oh, he can stay with me!” Jane quickly exclaimed, “Eiffel, we could talk about the good-looking passengers in the cafeteria.”

The Quartermaster frantically typed something into the monitor under his wrists. “I may have…” “… _overlooked_ …” “five vacant rooms… “available for occupancy.”

Eiffel could only stare at the Quartermaster in either awe or exasperation. He did not comment on how the alien attempted almost everything in his capability to separate him and Nurse Johns. It was quite hilarious.

“Aww,” The woman said disappointedly. Getting the necessary information and clearance from the Quartermaster – an Alliance senior officer would be meeting with Eiffel in a few days - they exited his office. Jane slotted her hand on Eiffel's elbow, “Come on, we’ll get you in your own space clothes.”

Taking their time going to the living quarters of the Eos 10 crew and officers, Jane toured him to where the basic facilities were located. Then they stopped under a sign that pointed to a long hallway leading to the kitchen. 

“Interface, is Levi in the kitchen?”

_“Yes, Nurse Johns.”_

Doug grinned up at the ceiling, a force of habit when he and a certain friend of his shared laughs. “You have an AI too?”

 _“You have a really pretty smile.”_

“SHHH!” Jane whispered harshly, specifically at the Interface.

The AI squeaked in surprise and remembrance. _“Oops! Sor—uhm!”_

Then complete awkward silence. The lights flickered for a second, almost threatening to leave them in darkness.

Eiffel stared at Jane, then at the ceiling, “What?”

Jane gave a pained sigh, pinching the bridge of her nose, then turned to him wearily, “I bet the 21st century doesn’t have sentient artificial intelligence yet. _At all._ ”

“Oh. We do.” He assured them. “In our spaceship anyway. We call her Hera.” He looked up the ceiling again. “What are _you_ called, darlin'?”

The AI giggled.

Jane sighed, “Okay, at least we haven’t messed with your timeline too much or something.”

They went to the hallway, to the kitchen. 

Then they were met with a tall humanoid alien who should definitely be wearing pants.

Jane immediately shoved her hand on Eiffel's face to cover his eyes, saving him the ungodly sight of extraterrestrial genitals.

“Levi!” Jane shrieked. 

“Oh! Hello Nurse Johns!” The alien replied, chipper.

“Levi.” She said slowly through gritted teeth, a warning. _“Put on your pants, before I shove it up where your pants should be covering!”_ She threatened.

But Levi had noticed the man beside her, he noticed Eiffel. “Oh, I didn’t know Dr Dalias was back. Hullo!” Oh, well not exactly Eiffel, but the nametag on the clothes Eiffel was wearing.

The alien looked at her, “Dr Dalias has seen me without pants, Nurse Johns, I doubt--"

“This isn’t Ryan. He's just borrowing Dr Dalias' clothes at the moment.” She let her hand fall to her side, “I thought it’d be good to introduce him to a friendly face before we go to his new place.”

Eiffel waved lamely at him, “Hi!” 

“Hullo! I am Arule Delatro Leviathan III. My friends just call me Levi.”

“Doug Eiffel.” He introduced.

“Do you like _sauce _, Mr Eiffel?” Levi asked in earnest, “Because I am this ship's saucier and I would like to commemorate you being in Eos 10.”__

__“Uh,” He shifted his eyes to Jane to help him with the very vague, and seemingly personal question that Levi just asked. “I'm okay with it? I mean I haven’t had the luxury of sauce 'cause in the Hephaestus, we've ran out of acceptable food options, but we have seaweed coffee.”_ _

__Jane pulled a face._ _

__Eiffel nodded, “Desperate times, Janey.”_ _

__“Come on, let’s get you settled in.”_ _

__They waved good bye to Levi and went on._ _

__

__

__

__

__

__The space clothes Eiffel got were less baggy than the one he was used to in the 21st century. It was… slimming._ _

__“Interface?”_ _

___“Hello Mr Eiffel.”_ _ _

__“Eiffel's just fine.” He sat on his bed, “What do you think of humanity?”_ _

___“It’s a bad concept, there’s that.”_ _ _

__He chuckled, “You’re not wrong.”_ _

___“But it’s also a very compelling species. With its faults and mistakes, they always make things better and worse.”_ _ _

__“Mm totally.”_ _

__He sat by the headboard, or where it should be._ _

___“Eiffel?”_ _ _

__“Yeah?”_ _

___“Can you tell me more? About your AI? About Hera?”_ _ _

__Eiffel smiled, “Of course, darlin'.”_ _

__

__

__

__

__

__The very next day, there was a diplomat, followed by a couple of bodyguards from the Alliance to interrogate Eiffel about his misplacement in the universe. Near the end, the diplomat had assured him they will do everything they could to take him back to where he should be. A man from the 21st century wasn’t much help for the Alliance apparently._ _

__Then before the diplomat went on his merry way, he begged Eiffel not to know too much about the future._ _

__Now Eiffel was walking around the space shuttle, trying his best to decipher where the closest men’s bathroom was._ _

__Within fifteen minutes he found himself in an unlit cargo bay._ _

__“Seriously?” He groaned, trying his hardest not to hit his head on the steel wall. “Oh _come on_! I just wanna take a leak!” He looked up the ceiling, “Interface, are you there?”_ _

__No reply._ _

__“This must be just like that secret laboratory in the Hephaestus.” He mused quietly._ _

__Then there was a loud scurrying to his left. Then a screech. Then it approached the lit part of where Eiffel stood._ _

__A rat as huge as a retriever screeched at him._ _

__Him screeching back in horror._ _

__“Woah there!” Came a new voice._ _

__Eiffel screeched at the man._ _

__The man furrowed a brow, slapping a hand over Eiffel's mouth, just to silence him._ _

__“Mmrf hrrf mmrf!”_ _

__The man winced, “When a guy puts his hand on your mouth, yer supposed to shut it, not slobber it up.”_ _

__“Sorry, I--"_ _

__The rat-dog came back to hiss at them._ _

__Eiffel shrieked, pointing at it. Little did he know, he was practically hugging the man._ _

__Then the creature retreated back into the shadows._ _

__The man chuckled, “You must be the new guy I heard from the saucier.”_ _

__Eiffel looked up at him, “You know Levi?”_ _

__The man blinked, then smiled, “Yeah.”_ _

__“I'm Doug Eiffel. Or just Eiffel.” He paused, “Uh, the Alliance officer told me to be discrete.”_ _

__The man went rigid, but Eiffel didn’t notice._ _

__“Fiddlesticks, uhm. Please don’t tell anyone else?”_ _

__“You with the Alliance, Eiffel?”_ _

__“Me? Oh no. I'm from the past. I'm an astronaut on the USS Hephaestus. I—I should really shut up. The more I say the more I probably destroy the future or some timey-wimey stuff.” He looked around, looking for the pair of evil red eyes. “You know where the bathroom is, uh…”_ _

__“Robin.”_ _

__“You know where the bathroom is, Robin?_ _

__“I'll take you there.”_ _

__

__

__

__

__

__“Oh there you are, Mr Eiffel.” Came Dr Urvidian's voice. “Where have you gone off too?”_ _

__“Was lookin' for the men’s, then I got lost and saw a huge rat, but good ole Robin here helped me out!” He turned to his companion, but saw that he had disappeared. “He was just—”_ _

__Dr Urvidian waved him off, “Must be some side effects of lengthy exposure in space.”_ _

__Eiffel stared at him, “Doc, I don't think--"_ _

__“Being alone for an extended time, it will cause hallucinations. Just like being stuck in a desert.”_ _

__Eiffel was stuck in wanting to retort and not having anything good to retort about. Silence won._ _

__“Come, Levi had been asking for someone to be his guinea pig.”_ _

__

__

__

__

__

__“How is our Space Man faring?” Dr Urvidian questioned as he sat with Jane._ _

__It was a slow hour in the food court of the space shuttle. The lunch hour rush had simmered down. Jane had offered Eiffel they have his first food court debut, but there were some complications in the med bay, so lunch had been late. The Interface was more than happy to keep Eiffel company._ _

__Jane munched on some baby carrots when she replied, “He's been going around fine. It’s cute, when he shrieks while pushing the wrong button and an alarm sounds. But the Interface had been helping most of the time.”_ _

__“Where did you say he was?”_ _

__She swallowed, “He went to get coffee, why?”_ _

__Dr Urvidian pointed at a scene about two tables away from them. “Apparently, he’s already got Dr Osolong wrapped around his finger.”_ _

__Jane snapped around, almost causing her a whiplash._ _

__Then and there, Doug Eiffel, Space Man who had been found floating towards Eos 10, was conversing with the very good looking Dr Osolong. They seem to have found a very good topic to talk about that they were all smiles and laughs._ _

__Eiffel turned and caught their eye, then bid Dr Osolong good bye, then scuttling back to Jane’s table. “Sorry. That guy just started talking about Pacman and Donkey Kong, I couldn’t help but strike a conversation 'bout arcade games.” He handed Jane her coffee. “Hey, Doc. You want one too?”_ _

__“How did you,” Dr Urvidian started, “in less than 48 hours in this ship, got what Nurse Johns couldn’t do?”_ _

__Jane hissed at the doctor._ _

__Eiffel blinked then shrugged, “I dunno. He's a really cool dude.” He turned to Jane, “He invited me for dinner. You wanna come?”_ _

__

__

__

__

__Commanding Officer Nurse Jane Johns, Genki girl extraordinaire, was following one 21st century man Officer Douglas F. Eiffel. She had been in the last 15 minutes._ _

__Usually it would take five minutes to get to where Eiffel was supposed to go to._ _

__But seeing it’s Eiffel, it tripled the time to get to wherever._ _

__Dr Osolong was such a nice man, in his nice suit._ _

__And Eiffel was flustered, in his standard Alliance uniform._ _

__Then Dr Osolong smiled charmingly, he offered they bail on dinner and go have late night waffles instead._ _

__That was when Jane decided to tire for the night, detouring to the nearest vending machine to get herself a pack of Skittles._ _

__Just because Jane stopped her pursuit of espionage of Eiffel's night, doesn’t mean no one else was watching over the man._ _

__One Akmazian had taken over Jane’s hobby for the night._ _

__

__

__“What can I get you, hun?” Asked the wait staff as they stood to Akmazian's left._ _

__“I'll get a coffee.” He muttered as he used the menu to conceal himself. Dr Osolong and Eiffel were sat at a table wedged at the corner, then they turn to the left and another line of tables_ _

__The wait staff noticed this and glanced at the other two people in the diner. Chuckling, they smiled at Akmazian. “Ex-boyfriend?”_ _

__“Friend’s brother. She asked me to look after him.”_ _

__The wait staff hummed and left to get him a cuppa._ _

__Right now, the two were sharing a large platter of onion rings. They were having some laughs, talking about Atari and Sega, whoever those where._ _

__The wait staff came back with his coffee and went to the other table to give their waffles._ _

__“I swear I can top your score on Tetris any day, bro!” Eiffel exclaimed, Dr Osolong only laughed._ _

__They stayed in the diner for more than an hour. And when Dr Osolong had asked for the bill, Akmazian slapped his payment on his table and left, hiding behind a pillar just before either Eiffel or the doctor could notice him._ _

__They were in front Eiffel's room and Akmazian was close enough to eavesdrop. Just around the corner was Jane’s room._ _

__“I had a great time, man.” Eiffel said happily, not the shy flirty kind Akmazian was sure the doctor wanted to hear._ _

__Now this was why Akmazian was there NOT to stalk Eiffel, but to guard him. Now why though? Because he had paid for unlimited access for a limited amount of time to the Alliance database and dig some digging on Eiffel._ _

__This 21st century man was an ex-military man, which did not show. He had been incarcerated for three cases of child endangerment and drunk driving. But along the line, he got to a lineage compressed metadata and found out that Eiffel was Dr Dalias' how-many-great grandfather._ _

__Akmazian thought that if he could get with the good graces of Mr Eiffel then maybe some odd twist of fate Ryan might be more inclined to liking him more._ _

__Then he heard Eiffel yell in surprise._ _

__Akmazian thumbed the safety switch on the small laser gun secured on his hip._ _

__Dr Osolong had pushed Eiffel back a wall and forced himself on the man._ _

__There was a small infinity of a second where Eiffel just stood there and Akmazian had a very good vantage point of the doctor’s head, ready to inflict more than a damage, not mortal suffering. Much more._ _

__It was a good thing Eiffel had pushed the doctor off of him. “Sorry! I-" He looked down at his own shoes, not exactly avoiding the other’s eyes, but gained his bearings, then looked the man straight in the eyes. “You’re a cool guy, Doc. But, I’m—I don’t see us as…”_ _

__“Akmazian?”_ _

__He twirled around and saw Nurse Johns staring at him blearily. “What are you--" The nurse was in her pajamas, a sleeping mask pushed up to her head._ _

__“Eiffel just turned down Dr Osolong.” Akmazian informed her, putting back the safety on his gun. He walked off._ _

__Jane could only watch in bewilderment._ _

__

__

__

__

__

__Eiffel entered his own room, shedding off his top and throwing it on his bed._ _

__“Hera, are you—” He stopped himself._ _

__He wasn’t in the Hephaestus. He wasn’t at Wolf 359. He wasn’t in his own time._ _

__He slid down the wall, down to the floor._ _

__No, he can’t do it now. Not now. He’s been doing so well since-since…_ _

__

__

__

__

___“Dr Urvidian, Nurse Johns! Mr Eiffel's cortisol levels are extremely high! His heart rate is beyond normal, and he’s wheezing. He's having an panic attack!”_ _ _

__The two medical personnel were immediately in front Eiffel’s room, the door whizzed open._ _

__Right in the middle of the room was Eiffel, on the floor in a fetal position. His face had lost color, his breathing was heavy and his eyes seemed to be bloodshot._ _

__Jane knelt beside him and making soothing circles on his back, “Eiffel, calm down. It’s . . . he’s getting quite sweaty” the nurse commented, concerned when he felt how wet his spacesuit was under her palm._ _

__Dr Urvidian knelt in front him, “It’ll pass, Mr Eiffel. You’re having a panic attack. You have to calm down.” He said in a calming yet controlled tone._ _

__Effiel’s palms were fisted together so tightly and his entire body felt rigid._ _

__“Come on Doug, everything’s going to be alright. Don’t worry, just relax and listen to the sound of my voice.” Jane whispered, soft enough as to not exacerbate his condition, though loud enough she wasn’t crowding over him too much._ _

__A few seconds and Eiffel’s breathing became slow, deeper, better. Then slowly he began to loosen up and his eyes started_ _

__“Good, that’s good.” Dr Urvidian assured him. He turned to Jane, “Let him sit down.”_ _

__Jane led him up to his feet, taking him to his bed and they sat. She unzipped the top part of Eiffel’s spacesuit, she fanned him the thin emergency guide booklet. “Once you’ve felt better, let’s take you to the med bay, mm’kay?” Jane told him._ _

__He nodded, then his eyes lifted to look at the ceiling, at the dismembered AI, unconsciously speaking, “Thanks Hera.”_ _

__And if the AI ever had lips, she would have smiled sadly, but she decided her voice was enough, _“Of course, Officer Eiffel.”__ _

__

__

__

__

__“Hey Jane,” Eiffel greeted, the door behind him whooshing close._ _

__Jane greeted back with a smile, “Oh hey, Eiffel, how's accommodations treating you?”_ _

__Eiffel leaned his him on the counter, “It’s better than my last spaceship.”_ _

__Jane chuckled, “So, what can I do for you?”_ _

__“What can I do for you, Jane?”_ _

__She turned to face him, head tilted, a flirty smile on her lips. “Are you suggesting, Eiffel?”_ _

__He laughed, “No, you're really really pretty, Nurse Johns, but not that kind of do.”_ _

__She pouted in half-heartedly. “Aww.” She put a hand on her waist, “So want to earn your keep, eh?”_ _

__“Yeah, kinda bored already.”_ _

__

__

__

__“He wants to work? Let him work then.” Dr Urvidian stated, squeezing a new tube of royal blue into his palette._ _

__Levi was on a chair a few feet away, posing already. They had told him what had happened to Eiffel and told him what to do just in case there was a repeat._ _

__Jane pursed her lips into a pout, folding her arms. “But—”_ _

__He twirled in his stool to glare at her, “Nurse Johns, Mr Eiffel had offered his aid, need I remind you, you had been whining about that new nurse; and you are now a commanding officer; now use this opportunity to practice having someone to order around.” He turned back to his array of paint tubes. “And, here’s to hope that was a one-time anxiety attack.” He muttered to his canvas._ _

__Jane petulantly unfolded her arms and balled them into fists on her sides. “But, Eiffel is just so pure! I don’t want to expose him to you or Levi every time he has to work at the clinic!”_ _

__Levi made a sound of retort._ _

__“Oh hush, Levi.” She reprimanded._ _

__Dr Urvidian made a long-suffering sigh, “I truly forget that you always have both feet between the line of space nurse and crazy fangirl.”_ _

__

__

__

__

__Dr Ryan Dalias exited the docking bay, only to be met by the sight of Dr Urvidian looking rather nervous, which Ryan was sure he had never seen on the man. (Sure, he was flighty when he started on his path to redemption, but that was different.)_ _

__“Dr Urvidian, what a surprise.” Ryan greeted as he stood in front the man._ _

__“Really?” The older man questioned, raising a brow, “How’s that?”_ _

__Ryan did his best not to scoff, and he succeeded. “You’ve never greeted me before. In fact, you’ve gone your way to avoid me.” His grasp on the handle of his luggage tightened. He remembered he has to give souvenirs once he gets settled back into Eos 10. He’s got a souvenir for everyone, even for Akmazian, he can’t believe himself. “Now, here you are as I’m stepping out of the airlock—” Then it clicked, there’s only one reason why anyone would let Dr Urvidian greet him “Oh my god, who died now?” To be honest, he wasn’t prepared to wear all black again._ _

__“What? No one.” He said in resigned exasperation. “I was in the area and knew you were arriving back this morning and was curious about your shore leave, that’s all.” He sounds genuine enough, Ryan thought_ _

__“Oh, it was nice.” They start walking deeper into Eos 10, the familiar interior they hand called workhome. “Too short actually, Gallifrey is really beautiful this time of year.”_ _

__Dr Urvidian nodded, commenting, “Time just flies there.”_ _

__“You’ve no idea. Thank you for ordering me to do this, I really did need a break.”_ _

__“Did you spend your entire leave on Gallifrey?”_ _

__“No, I did a layover at Exporera for a few days, went swimming at the crystal fjords at the isle of –” He babbles._ _

__“Oh, I bet that was just gorgeous.” The older man commented._ _

__“I couldn’t believe the colors!” Ryan stopped walking, turning to observe his commanding officer. “Okay, what the hell is wrong with you?”_ _

__Dr Urvidian stoppe too, then faced him. “I beg your pardon?”_ _

__“Why are you asking about my shore leave, why are you suddenly… a nice person—Oh my god, who died?” He demanded._ _

__“No one died!” The older man said in exasperation. “Alright, fine. I’ve come to you for—oh, I need information. Advice, perhaps.”_ _

__“About?”_ _

__“A female.”_ _

__“Is she sick?”_ _

__“Not at the moment”_ _

__Ryan blinked, “I’m not following.”_ _

__“Are you enjoying this?” Dr Urvidian questioned, weary, tone telling Ryan he was ready to give up. Give up what, Ryan wasn’t entirely sure._ _

__“Not especially.” He confessed._ _

__“Dating!” He exclaimed in annoyance. “I need your advice on dating.”_ _

__“ _Dating_?” He tries to remember his med student days, or his residency, he tries to remember anything and everything he could about ‘dating’ related to medicine, or science at that matter. “Native dating, rotational dating, carbon dating, what are we talking here?”_ _

__“Personal dating. Relationships. Person-to-person interaction.”_ _

__Ryan stared at him oddly, “With _you_?”_ _

__“Yes.”_ _

__“Is this a joke?” He looked around at the empty hallway they were in. “Are you guys setting me up? Is Jane gonna jump out of a storage locker and scream or something? Jane! Jane. No? No.” He saw the deadpan look on Dr Urvidian’s face, no it wasn’t a deadpan, it was a patient look, waiting for him to get over whatever incredulity he was having. “Oh my god, your serous. Okay, sure, let’s go talk.”_ _

__“Fine.” The older man breathed._ _

__“And, you know just so we’re clear,” Ryan said, if he doesn’t thread carefully, he might find a scapel in his liver once they get to the end of this hallway, “this female she also believes she’s in a relationship with you, right?”_ _

__“Shut up.” He said, irate._ _

__“Yessir.”_ _

__

__

__

__Ryan entered the med bay, the ER, specifically. He just had an awkward talk with Dr Urvidian about being… _normal_ , which Dr Urvidian was not. It was nerve-wrecking, and Ryan may want another shore leave, but he managed, so it’s good. Ryan had some time to do a few clinic hours before a minor surgery, he had passed by the nurses’ station only to find out it was Jane’s day off today, but the nurse in charge had told him the new nurse was cute. Workplace gossip is frowned upon as it was voluntarily done out of spite, but hearing wasn’t so Ryan couldn’t help but listen in on Dr Osolong’s failed date with the new recruit. Ryan honestly just wanted to sign in for the day and get on his way, but the nurse just decided his knowing on what had happened when he was gone was the nurse’s work moral obligation. He appreciates the sentiment._ _

__Just as he entered the staff room, he hears a screech and a man cursing his foot._ _

__“Are you okay?” Ryan questioned, hastily going to the man's side._ _

__The man looked up from and met Ryan's eyes._ _

__Brown met green._ _

__And whatever fling Ryan had back on Gallifrey was forgotten when the man have an apologetic smile._ _

__The man stood up straight, and held a hand out, “Dr Dalias, I presume?”_ _

__

__

__._ _

**Author's Note:**

> I'm at tumblr @justpatro, yell at me. Lol.
> 
> Thanks for reading, I hope you have a great week!


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